On my third week back at work my morning started as usually. Over the years I have tried and tested many ways to wake me from my slumber mostly with music, first off there was some The Clash, I fought the Law, however that made me wake up in a state of shock every morning, then came Jeff Buckley’s Grace but that was so relaxing I always fell back asleep. After that came an alarm clock, Jen Garner bought me with a helicopter top that would shoot off, fly around my room and emit a high pitched squeal until I caught it and placed it back on its docking station this lasted about two weeks as one, it required too much energy for early mornings and two I was fed up being hit in the face by a plastic toy helicopter propeller. After this I returned to my music to help revive me after a night of sleep and for a while I thought I had nailed it with Jason Mraz’s and Make it Mine, the starting lyrics “Wake Up Everyone” made me open my eyes with a smile on my face however after 3 months of listening to this song everyday I grew to hate it, actually not hate, despise! When ever it was played on the radio I turned into one of those brain washed CIA killers who once they hear the magic words turn into animals and murder intended targets without even knowing they were doing it. My teeth would clench, I’d start to foam at the mouth and my body would shake uncontrollably. Realising this wasn’t good for my mental health I went back to the drawing board. I needed a song that didn’t wake me up with a bang but didn’t make me fall back asleep and most importantly I wouldn’t grow to hate after a couple of weeks of hearing it non stop and then like Superman himself whispered in my ear I had it, The Superman Theme tune by John Williams. Not only does it start off slow and relaxing and after about 30 seconds starts to kick in allowing me to awake peacefully but not fall back asleep, waking up to the Superman Theme every morning empowered me.
After I awoke feeling ready to fight for “Truth, Justice and the American way”, I picked up my phone and put on the BBC news app. I do this every morning as I am concerned I may wake up one day forget to do it, get dressed and walk out my front door to see that we have been invaded by aliens and then get incinerated by one of their laser beams. I then checked my emails, sent off some replies while pondering how much longer I could stay in bed without risking missing the bus to work, this thought was soon interrupted by my dog scratching to get out the back garden for his morning pee.
I got out of bed, opened my bedroom door, stepped into the hall way and suddenly someone pressed the slowmo button on my life and I lost control of all my actions. My legs gave way from underneath me, I fell to the ground with a thud, landing on my side with my arm taking most of the impact. The next thing I remember is my head continuously hitting off the ground and Rumour entering the hall and shouting on Demi. As gradually started to regain control of my motions and Rumour and Demi helped me back up and into bed. After about 25 minuets I finally felt ready to try and get up again as I was determined to go to work despite protestations from Demi.
Yes, yes, yes I know what you’re thinking, stop pushing yourself you stupid fool, this has never happened before perhaps you should go and get it checked out but I only work for three hours, spend most of it sitting in an office, I had only been back for three weeks and to be honest I wasn’t particularly concerned by this funny turn, I was more concerned by the carpet burn that was left on the side of my face by my head continuously hitting of the carpet in the hall way. I got ready, attempted to cover the new feature on my face, had some porridge, Demi gave me a lift to work and completed my shift. Was I tired, had a headache, sore all over and my legs were worse than usual? Yes but I sat down for the whole three hours and didn’t push myself. During my shift Posh phoned to see if I was OK, Jack had to go up north to check on a project he was working and Posh decided to get up and half 5 in the morning on her day off to go with him (can not think of anything worse to do on my day off). From whatever Highland village they had stopped at she asked as this had never happened before should I not go and see the doctor? But I knew exactly what would happen, I would phone up be unable to get an appointment for 3 weeks, go and see house explain what had happened and although he would be so nice and understanding about it I would be told since it hadn’t happened again it was probably just be my M.E and there was nothing they could do about. I think sometimes I could turn green and someone along the way would say “Oh don’t worry about its just your M.E”. So I didn’t even bother.
I had the next day off to rest and by the following day I was back to my normal self and touch wood this funny turn hasn’t happened again.